Someone once asked me if J was religious. I said, not particularly, probably is more culturally Jewish. This person (who is against interfaith relationships) immediately went on a tirade about my in-laws as parents raising a Jew. If only they had been more involved in the synagogue. If only they had made him go to a Jewish day school or a Jewish summer camp. They should have fostered more of a Jewish identity in their home. If they had been clear intermarriage was…
I had a whole post written about this year’s Yom Kippur experience — how I assumed it would go. Spoiler alert: it was rough. I went to Kol Nidre services. Then I went to work where I had the hardest Yom Kippur of my life since I was, you know, actually working and not eating or drinking. Broke fast in the comfort of an edit room with all my coworkers during a last-minute meeting. None of them were fasting. All…
When I had lunch with a clergy spouse, it lead to an interfaith conversation. I can’t say I agreed with his feelings, but I understood them. New England is a weird place to move to. Especially if you move to a place that’s kind of far from a big city. J and I are lucky — we’ve made friends here because everyone we work with is a transplant. Those who aren’t in the same boat, struggle. This is how…
We had an exciting time this weekend since it was our first wedding as married people! Plus we got a side trip to the aquarium! It’s meant I’ve been spending a lot of time with my Jewish side. While I love them I think sometimes they forget we’re an interfaith couple. In the past, I would have taken this as a compliment, like I’m passing as the thing I want to be. But after everything we’ve been through I want to…
Sometimes interfaith life can seem like we’re Sisyphus, where each time we think we’ve figured it out the boulder comes back down and we’re trying to figure it out again. We went from not caring about organized religions, to an almost Jewish couple, to decidedly interfaith leaning Jewish. It’s been the leaning Jewish part that’s been a struggle. You see, there’s a ton of interfaith websites out there to support you if you’ve chosen to practice Judaism. Interfaith resources where…
I very much enjoy Jewish holidays. It actually pains me that my life my fall is my busiest time at work AND not everyone has it off which means if I take it off I continually have this conversation: Where were you? It was Rosh Hashanah. Oh, you’re Jewish? No, my partner is. So why do you celebrate? An then I get to explain that when someone we loves celebrates something different than us, we’re there to support them because that’s…
Recently JTA published this article about the Rabbis at B’nai Jeshurun, an influential non-denominational New York City synagogue, deciding they would officiate the weddings of interfaith couples who commit to raising Jewish children and having a Jewish home. On the heels of that announcement, the Jewish Theological Seminary committed themselves to their ban on clergy officiating interfaith marriages. While the B’nai Jeshurun announcement wasn’t perfect by any means and proves we still have a long way to go in supporting…
Every so often our congregation puts together dinners of different parts of the community. They’re always hosted by someone in the community who cooks up an amazing meal and there’s great conversation. Sometimes they’re just for empty nesters, or our TRIBE group of 20’s and 30’s, families with mitzvah kids in the coming year, and sometimes they’re open to all. I love my TRIBE dinners, but there’s something to be said about the open ones. I say this because…
I wrote previously about Finding Our Officiant. It was something that wasn’t with out struggle. Right now I have just 17 days left until I’m married. For a lot of reasons J and I had an engagement that has lasted over two years. And it’s good that we have. It gave us a lot of time to grow not just as a couple but as individuals as well. If it had only been a year I might have rushed into converting…
When I was a full-time, practicing Catholic I my favorite time of year was Lent. I’ll admit, it is odd for someone to say that they love Lent. But as a child I liked the challenge of not doing something I enjoyed. As I got older I enjoyed having that time to reflect on what truly mattered. I also lived for Palm Sunday mass because it was really like a play and I’ve always had a bit of a flair…